J&M Offering Used Toilet Paper To Roll Toomers At A Discounted Price

Community

In an effort to bring out more spirit in the Auburn Fans, J&M has started an initiative to sell their used toilet paper, at a discounted price, to fans who want to roll the trees but didn’t have time to go buy a pack.

“We try our damn near hardest to clean the toilet paper, but some stains just won’t go. Sometimes the toilet paper comes from the trees outside, but most times it’s the ones used right here in the store. We’ve got some complaints from the guys who usually spray down the Toomer’s Oaks for stealing their fun, but we think we’ve come to a compromise,” a representative for the J&M Bookstore told our Community team.

J&M plans on hiring college and high school students to start taking down the toilet paper from trees in the form of “Toilet Paper Ambassadors”, or lovingly known as “TeePeers”. They plan to get “donations” from surrounding businesses to increases sales and inventory.

J&M is really excited about their “TeePeers” program. They’ve got recruitment spread out to some of the surrounding schools and colleges, trying to get students to transfer in order to get every last bit of reusable toilet paper out of the depths of Auburn’s city as they can.

Surprisingly enough, this is getting full support from the Auburn-Opelika community sparking an increase in recyclable material (mainly just toilet paper) than some towns and cities have seen in decades. If you’re interested in becoming a TeePeer, applications are said to open up in 2043 – with the first set being the faces of the TeePee recycling movement.